Why Introverts Make Some of the Best Coaches—And How to Leverage Your Strengths

Many coaches have been told that success requires being outgoing, high-energy, and always “on.” 

But if you’re an introverted coach, that approach can leave you feeling drained, overwhelmed, and questioning whether coaching is really the right fit.

Today’s guest, Stacey Chazin, is a leadership coach who helps introverts transform their natural strengths into professional assets. 

In this episode, we explore the biggest myths about introversion, and how introverts can approach client calls, networking, and marketing in a way that actually works for them.

By the End of This Episode, You’ll Know:

✔️ How to structure your business so it works with your energy, not against it
✔️ Why common networking and marketing advice doesn’t always apply to introverts
✔️ The biggest myths about introverts that might be holding you back
✔️ How to confidently coach extroverted clients—without feeling drained

About Stacey Chazin:

Stacey Chazin is a dynamic leadership coach who empowers introverts to transform their innate qualities into professional assets and get the recognition they deserve. She holds a master’s in organizational development and leadership, degrees in marketing and communication, and certification as a Myers-Briggs Type Indicator practitioner.

Want to learn more from Stacey? Grab her Daily Productivity Hacks for Introverts or Conference Survival Guide for Introverts:
🔗 Productivity Hacks for Introverts
🔗 Conference Survival Guide
💻 Visit her website: ifactorleadership.com

Next Episode Teaser:

How do you move a conversation with a potential client forward—without it feeling awkward or forced? Whether you’re at a networking event, in a discovery call, or just chatting with someone who’s interested in coaching, knowing the right questions to ask makes all the difference. I’ll be sharing the five key things you need to uncover when speaking with a potential client—and how to use them to confidently guide the conversation toward a natural next step. If you’ve ever

Chapters

• 0:00 Intro: Are Introverts at a Disadvantage in Coaching?
• 1:52 Debunking Myths About Introverts
• 3:30 Why Introverts Need to Manage Energy Differently
• 6:19 How to Protect Your Energy as a Coach
• 7:01 Networking as an Introvert: A New Approach
• 10:19 Overcoming Internalized Stereotypes
• 12:37 The Power of Strength-Based Coaching for Introverts
• 17:15 Coaching Extroverts as an Introvert (and Vice Versa)
• 23:02 Setting Boundaries as an Introverted Coach
• 26:30 Where to Learn More from Stacey Chazin
• 27:11 Key Takeaways & Final Thoughts
• 28:30 Next Episode Teaser: How to Move a Client Conversation Forward

Transcript

Stephen Box: 0:00

Does being an introvert make coaching harder? Many coaches have been told that success requires being outgoing, high energy, and always on. But what if trying to fit that mold is actually holding you back? As someone who falls somewhere in the middle of introversion and extroversion, I get this struggle. I love having one on one deep conversations with people, But I also know how draining it can be to have like back to back calls or having to communicate with people in large environments where you don't know anybody. And for coaches who identify as introverts, it can feel like the way that coaching is supposed to be done. Just doesn't match how you naturally work best. And that's exactly what today's guest, Stacey Chazin, is here to talk about. She helps introverted professionals thrive by leaning into their natural strengths instead of working against them. So by the end of today's episode, you're going to know how to structure your business so that it works with your energy, not against it. Why common advice about networking and marketing might not apply to you and how to confidently coach your extroverted clients without feeling drained at the end of those conversations. Hey, if you are new here, welcome to another episode of Coach Smarter, the podcast that helps health, fitness, and nutrition coaches sharpen their skills. Stand out in a crowded market and build more efficient coaching business. I'm your host, Stephen Box. And I started my interview off by asking Stacy, for those coaches out there who are introverts, what are some of the biggest obstacles they might run into? Here's what she had to say.

Stacey Chazin: 1:53

Yeah. that's a great question. And, I guess if I could start off by defining introversion for you and I, and that's going to help your listeners understand my answer to follow. And, so for those, Those listeners who might not be familiar with the term introversion or may have heard some misperceptions. There are a lot of myths out there about what it means to be introverted. A lot of us think it means, you're shy, you don't like people, you don't like to work with others or, socialize with others. None of those things are true. and really what introversion refers to is, whether you're introverted or extroverted refers to how you give or gain energy from the world. So while extroverts are typically energized by being with other people, energized and doing their best work when they get to think out loud, talk through ideas, work with others, that's what gives them, that's what fuels them and sets them up to do their best work. While those of us who have a preference for introversion, or are introverted, as people typically say, Are energized by time spent alone when we we tend to do our best work when we can, spend time with our thoughts. Think through something a little more deeply over a longer period of time and have an opportunity to go deeper and more extensively with subject matter expertise on what this means is, what it doesn't mean is it doesn't mean that we don't like to talk to other people or engage with other people. But it means that when we do, we need to put some, some, some situations in place that are going to protect our energy. And for coaches, one big thing that means is that we probably don't want to schedule numerous coaching sessions with clients in the same day. Or if we do, we want to break those up by several hours at least, or, you know, an hour or two, because we need that time to recharge. And we're going to do really well when we engage with someone deeply like a coaching client, which I think is one of the reasons that introverts make excellent coaches, but we need to, put measures in place that are going to. Let us recharge, regain our energy so that when we're on the next call or in the next session with a client that we've got our energy back and we can be at our best.

Stephen Box: 4:09

So let's just pause on on this first thing that you kind of brought up here because one thing I want to get a little clarity around is this idea of recharging our batteries. I think for extroverts, it's really easy to kind of picture this, right? They. They have this idea of like, Oh, I get excited to be around people. I get excited to talk to people. I feel this energy after having these engagements. And I know for a lot of people who see themselves as more introverted, or maybe even people like I'm kind of like a middle of the road was that like, I think they call it. And so I have tendencies of both. And I know for myself anyways, what I find is. When I can just sit and like you said, think about things and be strategic, like it. Kind of lights me up a little bit, right? Like I feel energized by that, but I think for a lot of people, there's this idea of when introverts say, I just need time alone to kind of, you know, recharge my batteries, there's this negative stereotype out there that that means just like sitting down and like doing nothing and just being unproductive,

Stacey Chazin: 5:25

right? Right. So, I would say this, right. You're not being unproductive. You're actually being very productive in terms of. Protecting your mental and emotional health. and I think, you know, one of the challenges, it's a big challenge, actually, that, extroverts have misperceptions about what it means to be introverted, and I think that's exactly what you're getting at. and I think as introverts, we can reframe the conversation, reframe those, those statements we make, and maybe not using the word alone, but, saying I need, I need time to recharge, for a bit. I'm going to head off to my, to my comfy place or, you know, and you can even say to the extent that you're, that you're comfortable, you know, as an introvert or I'm introverted. and as an introvert, I need to just step away a little bit and I'm going to go recharge that when I'm back with you all, you're going to see the best parts of me, or I'm going to do my best work.

Stephen Box: 6:19

For those coaches out there that maybe find. That when they are around other people and it's draining their energy, and so they tend to avoid situations in which they have to be around other people as much as possible. So things like networking events are super scary for people who are really introverted because they know it's going to drain them. What are some of the strategies for them to make sure that they're getting, I mean, you kind of touched on it a little bit there with with some of those things to say, but what are some of the strategies for them to be able to make sure that they're able to. Not have their battery completely drained in those situations.

Stacey Chazin: 7:01

Mm hmm. That's such a good question because we do need to network. We need to go to conferences. We need to go to, you know, the Rotary Club or your local business association, right? and I can give you, if your listeners are interested, I can give you a link when we're done to put in the show notes for a conference survival guide I created for introverts. And it has a lot of strategies in there about how do you survive a big conference and show up as your best self. And one of the things I talk about is the networking piece. And so I'll share here that the idea, and this is with all the advice I offer, the idea is you want to tap into your strengths as an introvert, whatever it is you're doing. You don't want to pretend to be extroverted because it's not going to work out well for you. And so to your point, when you're networking, if you go into it like an extrovert word would and say, okay, I'm here. I need to collect 50 business cards or meet 50 new people. You're going to be depleted. You're not going to, it's not going to be a successful endeavor for you and anyone you meet, you're probably not going to. Go deep enough in the conversations to have it be meaningful. So as an introvert, what you want to do is tap into your strengths. So what are those when it comes to networking? We're really good at preparing, and we're really good at doing our research. So what I suggest is, let's say you're going to a multi day conference. For every, every day that you're there, Identify ahead of time three people who you want to meet, do your research, find them on LinkedIn or find them on their own website, learn about what are their priorities, what do they bring to the table, what is, what is it that you want to get out of the conversation. So maybe you want advice, maybe you want to discuss a paper they just wrote, or maybe you, you wanted a new job and you want their help with that, but prepare ahead of time. When you meet your three people each day, so let's say three day conference, target nine people who you want to meet and check them off your list each day. And when you've gotten through those three in any given day, you're done. Don't put any pressure on yourself to meet more people. And what this is going to allow you to do is, you're going to be more prepared for the conversations. You'll be able to go deeper in what you're talking about. You're more likely to make a stronger impression, a meaningful impression. And you're not going to deplete your energy in a way that you typically would when trying to network like the extroverts do.

Stephen Box: 9:15

Let me ask you this. I think a lot of times people have a tendency to buy into their own stereotypes, right? so for example, I know as a night owl, growing up and being told all the time like, Oh, you got to get up early and there's a worm and all this other nonsense that I felt like I was being lazy and that, you know, I was not doing the things that I should have been doing and that something must be wrong with me. Right. And it wasn't until I reframed my mindset to say, wait a minute, the day technically starts at midnight. I'm up doing work when the rest of these lazy people are in bed sleeping. Right.

Stacey Chazin: 10:01

Yeah.

Stephen Box: 10:02

So once I kind of reframed that I started looking at myself differently. What are some of the things that you see happen with introverts? What are some of the stereotypes that maybe they tend to buy into that's causing them problems when it comes to running or building their coaching business?

Stacey Chazin: 10:19

Yeah, and that's that feeling of not enoughness, that you're somehow falling short because you're not, meeting up to the norm or the standard. Much of our world is designed with extroverts in mind. Workplaces certainly are. And so these expectations that we show up, that we're gonna, that we're gonna network, that we're gonna have, you know, how can we maximize the number of coaching clients we get when really, maybe we're going to be a lot more effective and have a much greater impact on people's lives if we have fewer clients who we're working with more deeply, and we can probably do that. In ways that are going to be net revenue neutral to trying to maximize the number of clients. But I think that we we've gotten messages our whole lives, really, like when we're little, even in preschool, you want to play with more kids. Why doesn't she have more friends? You know, you're in high school. It's better to be going out on a Saturday night and having as many friends as possible. Then staying home, maybe and reading a book or watching a movie with your best friend. Right. So when we're thinking about coaching. I think it's. Changing the way we're, we're measuring our success. So, again, not in volume, but in, in the depth of impact, in the depth of relationships. And maybe as a coach, other ways that you're building your revenue, or, maybe you're, you're adding some self paced on demand offerings that allow you to give your services and make a difference in people's lives that aren't going to require you to engage live with them all the time.

Stephen Box: 11:48

Yeah, I think those are definitely some, some helpful ones. One that was coming to mind for me as you're talking about the conference stuff was a lot of introverts have told themselves, I'm not good with people. I'm not good being around people. I'm not good at making small talk. I'm not, you know, I don't make friends easily. And I think so much of that comes down to what you were just saying that that's because you're comparing it against the standard of what the world has told you you're supposed to be. So what are maybe some tips for them to kind of overcome some of those beliefs so that they can engage because I'm sure there's somebody out there that even when you say it over a three day conference, talk to nine people like nine people, you know, like how am I supposed to talk to three people a day? What do I even say to them? Yeah,

Stacey Chazin: 12:37

that's a great point. Right. And so I say the three, but you also have to adjust it to, you know, how you're going to show up as your best self. so I think, so one of the things I use in my coaching practice, I use a framework called appreciative coaching, which is essentially the idea that, it's rooted entirely in the positive. So, It's in a simplified way. I guide my clients to identify the best of who they are. What are your gifts and strengths, inclusive of your introversion, of all the things that come with your introversion, and to reflect on peak experiences you've had in your life, including professionally. And when you look across those peak experiences, you'll start to see some Common threads of, activities you did, ways you showed up, circumstances that were in place. And by looking at those common threads, you begin to see what your positive core is. Really the best of who you are. So it could be, for example, that you're a really strong writer, that you're an inspirational speaker, and that you're, let's say you're highly empathetic. And so once you know and you recognize your positive core, you can then take a look at anything in your professional life. so let's, let's talk coaching. What are some ways that you can be there for your clients, that you can market yourself, that you can build your business, that rely on your positive core? So for me, for example, I know that writing is one of my gifts. That's part of my positive core. So, blogging every week is one way that I put out my messaging and that I connect with people. if you're someone who is, highly empathetic and really good at connecting with people verbally and visually. having a, a YouTube channel or having LinkedIn lives once a week or once a month might be better for you. So the idea is put out of your head how the other people do it, focus on what's great about you, and then figure out how can you use those gifts to, to build your business, to connect more deeply with your clients, all that great stuff.

Stephen Box: 14:32

Yeah, I love this because It's something I use in my own coaching, where when people start focusing on what they haven't done, what negative things are happening, I always go back to, okay, what's actually worked, what has gone well, because there's skills there, there's talents there that exist that we can utilize to strengthen those weaknesses,

Stacey Chazin: 14:57

right?

Stephen Box: 14:58

And it's doubling down on your strengths.

Stacey Chazin: 15:02

100%. That's because what we focus on. That's what changes.

Stephen Box: 15:06

Yeah.

Stacey Chazin: 15:06

Right. And trying to tend to be something we're not, is rarely going to lead to success in any way.

Stephen Box: 15:13

Yeah, you have to be authentic to who you are. And I, I always talk a lot about the importance of your VIPs, which is your values, your identities and your priorities. Love that. And I think the one that people miss out on a lot of times is identities, right? They get the values part, they get the priorities part, but they miss the identities. You have to, like, realize all these different roles that you play, you know, are you a spouse? Are you a parent? Are you a child of, you know, or your parents are still around? Are you a friend? Are you a volunteer? Like, you have all these different roles that you play, and Every one of those roles requires a slightly different version of you. You have to realize what values match up to your skills and your natural abilities in those areas, right? You're not going to teach clients necessarily the same way you parent. That's right. They're different situations.

Stacey Chazin: 16:13

That's right. And ideally, whatever role you're in, you should be tapping into those strengths that you have into your positive core. And the, the specific aspects of your, of your positive core that you're gonna use in those different roles and situations is probably gonna vary a bit, right? Being a parent, you might not wanna rely on using your, your writing skills as a parent. But, who knows? I don't know. Maybe you do. But it's gonna be different. Maybe you're tapping more into your empathy and your emotional intelligence. when you're doing it that way, when you're thinking about being a parent. So that's great. I love that framework.

Stephen Box: 16:44

Yeah. And then you don't have to feel pressured to use all of your skills in one area, right? You can pick and choose which ones work best for what.

Stacey Chazin: 16:53

Yeah. And I think, let's say just as an extreme, let's say you're, you're using your writing skills. If you're writing all the time in different roles, you're going to get tired of it. It's gonna, you're not going to be as fresh with that skill, but if you can put it aside, tap into some other skills and other roles, you're coming back and you're recharged, you're, you're, you're refreshed and can apply the writing gifts where you need them.

Stephen Box: 17:15

So the takeaway that we would have from this just to make sure that everyone's kind of on the same page here is if you are that person who kind of has that doubt and you question your ability to do a lot of things and you find yourself saying, I can't, I can't, I can't, or I don't like to, then really think about what do you enjoy doing, what actually does make you feel good, what does energize you and do more of that.

Stacey Chazin: 17:43

That's exactly right.

Stephen Box: 17:46

Let me ask you this. One of the issues I will see a lot of times for coaches is we've been taught when you're in a coaching call to match energy with people, right? It's just something that you're taught as a coach. And that is very difficult. On both sides, right? If you're, if you're an introverted person and you have a really extroverted client, it's you to match that energy. And if you are an extrovert and you have a very introverted client, it becomes very frustrating because I hear all the time from intro or extroverted coaches, how they feel like they're having to pull teeth when it comes to, yeah. With their introverted clients. So what are some tips that you can give on both sides here? So if you're an introvert dealing with extroverts and an extrovert dealing with introverts.

Stacey Chazin: 18:31

Yeah, so I will say I don't have to worry about this because I am an introvert who works only with introverted clients. So I think that's a really, that's a big advantage. But, what I'll say, and this, this is true if you're a manager in a workplace as well, right? You want to know, you want to know your audience. You want to get to know what is it, what can I do as a coach, as a manager, to bring out the best in my clients? or, or my team members and so I, I would say learn about, so as, as an extroverted coach, let's say you want to learn about what, what am I introverted clients need to succeed. and one thing, so what I, and I talked a little bit about this before. we like when we have a chance to prepare. So let them know ahead of time what you're going to be talking about that day. Are there, is there some reflecting they can do ahead of time? let them know so that you're not springing questions on them and not all the questions, of course, but give them a sense of here's what I'm thinking we're going to cover in our next coaching session. Let me know if that aligns with with what you want to achieve, where you want to focus so they can begin that thought process. That's a big thing for them. it could also be that you give them an opportunity to reply to you in writing afterward. If they want to give some additional thought to what you've asked them, what you're exploring, they might come back to you with greater, greater insights if they have time to digest a little bit. and maybe it's they're digesting, they're coming back to you in your next session to do that. So that's a big one. and also I would say for, for the duration of your sessions even. So it could be that, that your introverted clients only have really a 30 minute window where they can really stay focused and engage with you. So maybe it's not, if you're typically doing a one hour session, maybe, maybe offer that as an option to see what, you know, what they're looking for. and in terms of. Introverted coaches, understanding about extroverts, definitely less of my area of expertise, but you want to see like what can you do to, to get your clients energized. read up on what it means to be extroverted. so what, one of the things that means is, a person tends to thrive and do good work when they can. Talk through their thoughts, which you're doing in a coaching session, presumably anyway. but you're, they get that energy from the engagement. Maybe they're going to do better with a longer coaching session. so really, it's, it's keying into how do they thrive? So you can meet those needs.

Stephen Box: 20:59

One of the unique challenges that I think I could see coming up here for a lot of people is. I find that with extroverts, it's easier if you ask them a question, very like open ended, short question and just let them go that they'll, right, they'll, they'll answer the question. But one thing I could see maybe coming up for introverts in that situation is because they like to process things and have more time to think about it. They just got info dumped on, right? Like now their extroverted client has just dumped like a 10 minute answer on them. And they're having to process it in real time. Is there any suggestions that, if you have any experience with this, that you could give to them on how to kind of deal with that better?

Stacey Chazin: 21:43

So the introverted client has just dumped on the introverted coach a whole bunch of information, is what you're saying?

Stephen Box: 21:49

Extroverted client has just like

Stacey Chazin: 21:51

Oh, dumped on the introverted coach. Ah, that's a good one. Well, I think that as coaches, and this is true in all different roles, if If you as a coach need some more time to process that to show up as your best self and give your client the best of who you are, I think it's fair to ask for that as well. and I think, so one of the things I talk when I, when I'm talking about coaching and working with introverts in a workplace, one of the pieces of advice I give is that when a team first comes together, that everyone should go around the table and share with the rest of the group, what's one thing you need. To be successful on this team, or what do you want the rest of the group to know about the circumstances and support that you need to be at your best and do your best work. And I think that when you're starting a coaching relationship, I think as a coach, it's valuable to have that same conversation to let your clients know Who it is they, who it is they've hired. And, if at times I need some time to process as your coach, I'm going to give you, I'm going to give you the advice and the guidance, but you're going to get your best advice out of me sometimes when I have a chance to process a little longer. So be upfront about that.

Stephen Box: 23:02

I really like that. There there's really, there's a couple of things I could think of here, right? Is. One, a lot of times as a coach, if you're using something like motivational interviewing, you're reflecting a lot of stuff back to people anyways. So you can utilize that tool of just reflecting back and asking that client what they think would be the next logical step and just get them to kind of do a lot of the talking. But I love the fact that you also brought it back to this idea of saying it's perfectly okay. As a coach, for you to have a boundary

Stacey Chazin: 23:35

to

Stephen Box: 23:37

say, Hey, you I need some time to think about that and get back to you. And that's what it is. It's a boundary. It's you saying in order for me to show up as my best self for your, as your coach, I need a little time to think about this

Stacey Chazin: 23:53

and

Stephen Box: 23:55

no one's going to go. Well. I don't have time for you to think about that because I need an answer right now. And if somebody truly does feel that way, there may be, you're, it's not the right fit, right? They're not the right client for you. And that's okay. Not everyone's the right fit for everybody.

Stacey Chazin: 24:13

Right. And sometimes the, you need to do this, not just because you're introverted and they're extroverted. Sometimes, a client asks you a question and you really do need to think about it because the answer is not immediately coming to you, right? We've all been there. And I don't, I know with. with one of my coaches. She'll say that sometimes I want to think about that before I give you advice. And I appreciate that, that she's not just answering on the fly and that when I get her, her guidance, it's going to be, it's going to be rooted in reflective thought.

Stephen Box: 24:42

And I will just throw out real quick for the extroverted coaches out there, if you're coaching introverts, one of the points that you brought up was this idea that Introverts do really well when they have information presented to them beforehand, and they, and they kind of have an understanding of where the flow of things is going to go. And a funny example of this was the other night, my wife and I sat down to watch a Curses movie that we had never seen before. It was a, it was a new movie for us. And. Me being kind of in the middle, my extroverted part of my brain, I guess, can like see things and start like predicting what the future is going to be and like I can figure out the plot line fairly quickly and all that stuff. And at the end of the movie, we're talking about, you know, getting each other's opinion on on how the movie was or whatever and my wife, who's very introverted goes. Yeah, I wasn't sure about it for the first 10 minutes because I was trying to figure out where they were going to go with this.

Stacey Chazin: 25:43

Yeah, yeah, that, that, that's where your, your head naturally goes. So whether you're at work or you're, you're coaching or you're watching a movie, that's how we're wired. That's how we show up.

Stephen Box: 25:52

Yeah, so, so I just thought that was a great illustration of exactly what you're saying. If you give them kind of the outline and go, this is where we're headed today.

Stacey Chazin: 26:02

Mm hmm.

Stephen Box: 26:03

It just, it makes that process so much easier for them. Because they're not now trying to read into what you're saying. They're not trying to figure out where this is going. And they're not trying to see what you're trying to elicit out of them.

Stacey Chazin: 26:17

That's right. And that can be distracting, right? If we're, if we're trying to figure out, figure that out, then we're not really paying attention to the other questions that are being posed or the discussion we're having with our coach, for sure.

Stephen Box: 26:30

so Stacy, if someone would like more help with this stuff, what is the best way for them to contact you?

Stacey Chazin: 26:37

They can find me on my website, which is, i factor leadership.com. So the I factor is, all that makes makes you great as an introvert. I factor leadership.com and they can learn there about how they can work with me as a coach. and I also have an on-demand learning program called the Introverts Leadership Formula. Which, is a program that guides introverts, to be more powerful communicators, to prevent burnout, and, to specifically, how do you ask for a raise, a promotion, a role, in ways that make it difficult for someone to say no?

Stephen Box: 27:11

I thank you once again to our guest Stacey Chazin, and also thank you for listening today. If our conversation got you thinking, be sure to go check out Stacey's links in the show notes and connect with her. You'll find everything that you need there. And if you enjoyed today's episode, do me a favor and share this with an introverted community. Coach that you know could use it before we wrap up and I give you a teaser for our next episode. Let me give you a few quick takeaways from today's conversation. Number one, you don't have to act introverted or I'm sorry, you don't have to act extroverted to be successful. You can lean into your strengths as an introvert. Number two, managing your energy is key. And that means structuring your schedule and interactions in a way that works for you, not necessarily what people tell you should be doing. And number three, networking, marketing, and even coaching extroverted clients can be done in a way that feels natural once you stop trying to fit someone else's mold. And next time here on Coach Smarter, we're going to be diving into something that comes up for so many coaches. How do you move a conversation with a potential client forward without it feeling awkward or forced? Whether you're at a networking event, in a discovery call, or just chatting with someone who's interested in your coaching, knowing the right questions to ask makes all the difference. And that's why on our next episode I'll be sharing the five key things you need to uncover when speaking with a potential client, and how to use them to confidently guide the conversation toward a natural next step. So if you've ever struggled with that transition, you definitely do want more information. Do not want to miss our next episode, but that is it for today. thanks again for tuning in. This is Stephen Box reminding you that coaching smarter creates a lasting impact for you and those you serve.