Overcome Imposter Syndrome, Build Confidence as a Coach

Do you ever feel like you need to chase after one more certification or constantly compare yourself to other coaches? If you’re struggling with imposter syndrome and feeling like you’re not enough, you’re not alone. In this episode, Stephen Box shares the most effective tool to help you overcome imposter syndrome and finally start building the business and life you desire. Whether you’re a new coach or an experienced one, these insights will help you combat those feelings of self-doubt and reclaim your confidence.

BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU'LL DISCOVER: 

• Why imposter syndrome is a common hurdle for most coaches—and why it doesn’t mean you're unqualified
• A powerful strategy to stop doubting yourself and start building real confidence in your coaching abilities
• How to break free from the trap of constant comparisons and set your own standards for success
• Practical steps to track your growth and progress, without relying on external approval from clients or social media

Transcript

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Do you find yourself as a coach constantly going after another certification, trying to learn one more thing, or constantly asking other coaches how much they charge, what do they have in their plans, and worrying that you're not going to be able to deliver the results for people that you're promising? If so, you might be experiencing imposter syndrome and on today's episode, I want to give you the best tool for overcoming imposter syndrome so that you can start to build a business in life that you desire. And that's coming up next right here on Own Your Calendar. Welcome to Own Your Calendar. The go to resource for online business owners, coaches, and course creators. Who wanted all a profitable business and the time and energy for yourself and the people and things you love most. I'm your host, Stephen Box. And I'm here to help you build the systems and habits that allow you to escape the chaos and start living life on your terms. Hey there, welcome to another episode of Own Your Calendar brought to you by Unshakable Habits. I am your host Stephen Box and today we're talking about overcoming imposter syndrome as a coach. Now this is mostly going to be for new coaches. But you may be an experienced coach who also is dealing with some imposter syndrome and today's episode might be helpful for you as well. Specifically, I'm going to dive into the one thing that I believe through experience makes the biggest difference in helping you to combat imposter syndrome. Before I jump into that, I do want to share a couple things with you. Number one. Impostor syndrome is totally normal. Every single coach that I have ever met, myself included, has at some point or another dealt with impostor syndrome. And the truth of the matter is, it's not something that ever truly, fully goes away. It's something that will creep its way back into your mind every so often. And the strategies I'm going to give you today is the best tool that I know for combating it and keeping it at bay. When we start talking about imposter syndrome, how does this actually show? what does it mean to have imposter syndrome? So first and foremost, understand imposter syndrome is internal. No one else necessarily believes those things about you. There is always going to be doubters, there's always going to be haters, but there's also way, way more people out there who want to see you win, who want you to succeed. And that's just the reality of the situation, but internally, it's so easy for us, and again, I've been guilty of this, to take those negative thoughts and then have something happen and justify our belief, if I say to myself, you know, people aren't going to want coaching from me for whatever reason, and then I go out and I make a post on social media, and no one responds to it, It is very easy for me now to come back into my own head and say, See, I told you, no one cares what I have to say. I went out, made a post, and you got no responses. And this can sometimes be compounded by the fact that we will get lots of likes and comments on a post where we share a picture of a kid or a puppy or celebrating an anniversary or a birthday. But then when you post something about your business, crickets. And again, this is not uncommon. You are not alone in this. Even some of the best coaches in the world still have this happen to them when they post things about business. I know because I've had conversations with these people. They've told me that it happens to them. The difference is in the way that they react to it. And that's really what we're going to dive into today. And I'm actually going to keep today's episode pretty short because I really just want to narrow down on this one tool. There's. A lot more I can teach you on imposter syndrome, but I wanted to narrow today down to what I feel is the most important tool for you to develop in terms of overcoming imposter syndrome. And then I'm happy to dive into other tools on a future episodes. One final thing before I give you the tool, and this is related to the tool. That's why I want to give this to you first. It's important for you to understand the way human beings are designed in order for us to take action. We need to have two things occur. Number one is we have to believe that we have control of this situation. Number two, we have to believe that we are capable of doing it. And imposter syndrome. Those two things do not coincide with one another. Those two things are missing. And a big part of the reason those two things are missing Is that so often, especially as new coaches, when we don't even know ourselves what to expect or what we need to put out there. We start looking to other people. So in other words, we start asking other coaches, Hey, what are you doing? How much are you charging? What are you offering? We start running polls. Hey, what should I name my business? What do you guys think about my logo? Hey, what do you think about these packages? And I'm not saying that you never get feedback on things. I'm not saying that we don't reach out and we don't get input from other people. It's a slippery slope because if every decision we're making is based on what other people do or what other people tell us, we don't have any control of the situation. We're not really making decisions. We're just following along other people's plans, which is completely different than getting valuable feedback Considering it and then, maybe taking maybe not taking it the other thing is when you're just copying other people, you're now trying to live up to their standard. So if I, for example, go out and I'm following another coach and I see that they're putting out these like fantastic videos and they're so super quality and they got these great transitions and everything else. It's so easy to get in my own head and start going, I don't know if I can do that. I don't know if I can do what they do. I'm now trying to live up to their standard instead of my own standard. And so really guys, that's what this comes down to. And that is really where we dive into this tool we're going to discuss today. You have to set standards that have no external validations. That's the tool. That is the secret to getting away from the initial. Onslaught of imposter syndrome is to get away from the expectations of the external world. I think especially nowadays, most of us look to social media as the way to market our business. Makes sense, right? A lot of people on social media, it's easy, it's free. Let's be honest, as a new coach, free is always appealing, right? But the problem is when we start getting on to social media now, our follower count has some validity to us. If I don't have a certain number of followers, I must not be a good coach. If I don't get a certain number of likes, my content must not be that good. If people aren't commenting, people must not like me. If people aren't sharing my stuff, they must not be finding it valuable. You have to realize If you have, say, a hundred followers, there's probably 10 to 15 people on average who might see your stuff, who will never like it, will never comment on it, will never share it, but they actually do like it. They actually think it's really good, but you won't know that, right? And so you're just using the external validation or I see this all the time and some of these Facebook groups where people are like, Oh, Hey, what do y'all think about this? let me get some feedback. and you're getting vague feedback, you're going to get a lot of it. And some of them may be relevant, most of it, in all honesty, will not be relevant. And it's going to make it very hard to figure out what you want to do. So the key, really and honestly, is to stop focusing on what other people are doing. Stop focusing on the external validations. Stop focusing on copying other people. just get rid of all those concepts completely. And instead, what I want you to do is start focusing on internal validations. So what does that actually look like to focus on internal validations? So glad you asked. There are really Two different kind of ways you can look at this. There is objectives and then there's subjective. So objective would be how consistent are you? You can track that, right? How efficient are you, right? How long does it take you right now to create a social media post? How long does it take you to create an email newsletter? How long does it take you to do an initial coaching call? And then you can work on getting better. You can work on improving those skills to improve those things. that's objective. We can easily track those. And yes, they're external in terms of they're something you're doing outside of you, but you're not looking for validation externally. You're just looking for it's a action that you're taking and you're just tracking it. So you're looking at the numbers themselves. There's no emotions with numbers, right? There, it is what it is. And then subjective is thinking about your comfort level. So for example, maybe you don't like doing video and you start making videos. how comfortable are you getting on video? Or like a really great example, a personal example for me, I have a tendency when I write to go overly professional on my writing and it doesn't really sound like me. It's not authentic. And so one of my goals this year has been to write more and get good at sounding authentic when I write. And I'm not perfect yet. I still haven't quite got where I want to be yet. But I can measure it in terms of I can go back and look at old writing and I can look at my current writing And I definitely feel like I'm getting closer to my own voice. And so, that's another thing you can do. how much do you procrastinate? If you're procrastinating all the time, right now, or you feel like you're procrastinating all the time, is there something you can do where you feel like you're procrastinating less? And, how good do you feel about your content? do you feel better about the stuff that you're writing now versus, six months ago? Those are all things you can actually go and look at and they're trackable. So that's the important thing is you need to be able to track it. And that's the tool that I wanted to give you guys today is cut out the external validations and instead focus on those objective and subjective things that you can track, that you have control over. And if you do that, you're going to find that your imposter syndrome may not completely go away. But you're going to be able to keep it managed a lot better, which is going to allow you to start building that business in life that you want. If you enjoyed today's episode and you want more content like this, I would encourage you to follow me over on my YouTube channel. Our handle is at Unshakable Habits. And that link will also be in the description. Also, just so you guys know, we do have a insiders club. It is called own your calendar plus, and it is a 5 monthly membership. where you can submit questions directly to me that I will answer on a special members only podcast. So this is a great way if you were thinking about working with me, coaching, but you're not ready to completely take the plunge yet. This is a great way to get your feet wet and get some coaching from me, by submitting those questions. Also, please join us on our next episode where I will be interviewing Michael O'Neill, who helps people with chronic pain. Now, you might be thinking, why are we talking about chronic pain on a podcast that is about aligning your business and life goals? here's the thing. A lot of business owners that I have talked to Especially when it comes to coaches and course creators. They spend a lot of time in front of a computer. They're not necessarily taking the time to exercise and eat well, and there's health issues. And that comes with chronic pain a lot of times. And that pain is not only having a physical impact, but it is having a mental impact. And it's preventing them from showing up as their best self in their business, in their relationships, in their lives. So I want to share with you guys some really great tips for helping you to learn to overcome and deal with that chronic pain that's preventing you from living your best life with Michael O'Neill next week. But until then, this is Stephen Box reminding you, as always, today is a great day. To break free from the chaos and start living life on your terms.